Special Announcement

Hello Everybody Fans! Funtime Fed here. Before the announcement, I would like to thank Stanford for standing in for Me in the French Open, Roland Garros, Paris, France. You all know I’ve never really liked it there, even though everybody likes Me there. You can win today Stanford, remember, this is 2017, not 2008. Today…

Roland Garros 2017

Hello Everybody Fans, Long time no hear from Me. I hope you are all well. I am. It is with not much regret that I have to announce that the French Open, in France, that normally takes place in Paris (also in France coincidentally) has been cancelled this year. Rafaello’s winning run on the dirty…

Gael in a Gale

When I created the world in 14 days, I took the middle Sunday as a day off to relax and do the restations. Something Mr. Wimbledon acknowledges and respects by making the prohibitations of tennis matches on that day. Look, I totally acknowledge the draw I was gifted, though when you expect something it isn’t such…

Empty Seats and Request a PseudoGraph

Bounjour Mon fans, There are a few points that I would like to discuss aujourd’hui. Firstly, yesterday was My third round match and the stadium was about a third empty. Everybody loves Paris and Roland, but could someone be kind enough to remind him that this is a Grand Slam event. Mr. Wimbledon always ensures a packed…

Security Memo – Roland

Dear Roland, Following My previous blog post that I kindly presented to the world celebrating our friendship, you immediately cause Me the embarrassizations by letting an unauthorized individual on court that proceeded to touch My person. To try and prevent this happening again, I shall list the only people allowed on court when I am in attendance:…

You’re My Best French

To celebrate this year’s French Open I penned a little gem. (Original lyrics, John Deacon. Now improved upon by Me) Ooh, you make Me live Whatever Mr. Wimby can give to Me It’s you, you give me more Ooh, you make Me play now Roland Ooh, you make Me live That’s the best draw That…