Part 3 of the GOAT Science Manual – Astronomy


Do you ever look up to the sky at night and think about where we came from? The wonder of seeing the twinklings of the stars, distant planets and E.T. on his little bicycle. Nowadays you can purchase magnifying tubes called telescopes and search the surface of the moon from your small garden knowing that not that long ago on Apollo 11, Neil Armstrong, Michael Collins and Buzz Lightyear walked on its surfrace (Nadal 2014).

I believe David Ferrer once asked, Is There Life on Mars? Soon NASA will go and find out if the red planet is inhabited by little red people for David. I won’t be visiting as the surfrace looks like clay.

As well as planets, stars and moons, the universe is littered with comets and the asteroids shooting around the galaxy, almost mimicking my serves and unforced errors. It is said that one of them once killed the dinosaurs but I was never fined nor suspended so I refute this notion.

Scientists have often said that for every grain of sand on earth there are ten times as many stars, can this be true? I would like to make the disagreement faces and put forward a new propositions after years of personal research and using My pocket calculator; for every star in the universe, I have 2.4 members of staff.


You see mon fans, in the grand scheme of the universe, we are practically insignificant (when I say ‘we’, I don’t include Myself, obviously). Yet we are here, making the contemplations, wondering about mankind’s biggest question we have asked ourselves through generations, why… how… am I always scheduled to play an evening match? You’re welcome.

Much love,
PF xx

10 thoughts on “Astronomy

  1. I am perplexed by the spelling mistake contained in the above missive, some staff member or dictionary needs replacment. Surface is spelt as such. Much consternation, but awaiting the name of a constellation after 🎾 🐐

  2. I’m learning so much about science from you. You explain it so well that even a two year old can understand it.

    If I can make so bold I have a theory which explains why you always play night matches. It is so that you can continue your astronomical observations even while you are playing.

    I have two questions for you that I am hoping you will be gracious enough to answer:

    1. Is the moon really made of Swiss cheese?
    2. Is it true that Rafaello has a star named after him?

    • Hello Rosa fan, lovely to hear from Me.

      Thank you for the complimentations.

      In answer to your questions:
      1. I don’t think so otherwise it may melt?
      2. If it is true I will submit a complaint, please see to it for Me


      • It’s wonderful to know that even the GOAT is humble enough to reply to fans.

        I was composing the letter of complaint on your behalf. I think I will send it to Patrick Moore, Stephen Hawkins and Brian Cox. In case you’re too busy to watch the televisions you may not know that Patrick Moore (actually a “Sir”) used to have a programme called “The Sky At Night”. It is no longer shown but it would be out of this world if you took over the programme, describing your view from on court.

        However, I have decided not to send it as I realised that you do not need a star named after you as you yourself are the brightest constellation in the universe.

      • I have heard of these names Rosa fan. I do not think it is possible to send a letter to Patrick Moore but your positive intentions have been noted.

        Best wishes,
        GOAT xx

  3. I read this with avid interest after your opening sentence as I too have stared at the heavens asking the same question. On reading your last sentence I had the overcoming of rage as I’m of the great annoyances for your night matches. I cannot write any more until I retain the tranquillity. I hate favouritism even though Sir Andy of the Murrays is my favourite star in the tennis constellation.

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