Hello everybody fans!

This weekend Andrew and Kim will be married. Staff and I wish them every happiness.

As you all know, much of My staff have infiltrated many areas of society, from The White House, Top News Agencies, The ATP and Sesame Street. Through such contacts I can bring you special secrets: GOATileaks. Here I provide you with an advance viewing of the wedding vows Andrew and Kim have written for each other:

I, Andrew of the Murrays, take you, Kim Swears, to be my lawfully wedded wife, my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of our family and friends and of course the almighty GOAT that oversees each and everyone of us, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful hitting partner, in the first set and also in the third. In the case of a Grand Slam I vow to be there if you need me for all five sets. In good line calls and in bad, and in joy as well as in Hawkeye, I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honour and respect you, to laugh with you and swear with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.