Posts Tagged ‘McEnroe’

Good morning fans!

Every year I write a letter to My friends at the Wimbledon. It’s like a tradition we have together. This year because of bloggings technology I thought you would all be so happy to see it so I am sharing it.

I tried to get in contact with Jim Courier to make the deliveries it but his people said he doesn’t do this. I wish he would make up the mind.


Dear Mr. Wimbledon,

I hope you are well. I am.

Here is My usual anniversary letter with the requests for this year’s draw into the Law and Tennis Associations.

I request NOT to be on My side of the draw:
Nadal – I have spoken with Bjorn Borg and we don’t like him.
Djokovic – Noisy families, keeps winning.
Tom Haas – Has an unhealthy interest in other players and their injuries and he beat me in the Halle.
Andrew Murray – Can beat Me. Everybody around him also seems to be called Murray. Suspicious. This is like Paul Anaconda being called Paul Roger. Please investigate, high priority.
Isner – He beat Me in St. David’s Cup and too tall.
Tsonga – He is the French one that knocked Me out last year. There is also something strange on his head this year.
Raonic – Strange name. Too many vowels.
Nalbandian – Dangerous but a good friend to have around in gangster situations.
John McEnroe – He has beaten Borg and is STILL playing now, can you check whether this is legal?
Bartoli – Her serve motions make me frightened.

I request you CAN put on My side of the draw:
Andrew Roddick – He is usually on My side so OK. His cap is always wet.
Lleyton Hewitt – as above
Baghdatis – as above but without the hat.
Goffin – He is the little boy. You can hype this match up a lot with no serious reason. Yes.
Sue Barker – She won the French Open but is quite small.
Johnathan Lloyd – Apparently he used to like having the photos taken of himself in his undergarments. I am not comfortable with how small the fitting was.
Patrick McEnroe – He had a great career as a doubles player and also part of a famous musical duets with Paul Simon.

Thank you for the usual considerations. As usual, Centre Court only, don’t do a Garros on Me.


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This is an interview with one of My favourite Journalists and was conducted specifically for My bloggings for My fans.

Journo: My thanks to Roger for taking time from His busy schedule for this interview.
Me: Yes

Journo: How would You describe Your life and career at the moment?
Me: For My life, I was born as a boy in Swizerland, went to school and became an adult. My career, I play tennis which is a game with two bats called racquets and a round ball. You hit it over the net to your opponent. Hopefully they don’t hit it back.

Journo: How does it make You feel when people describe you as the Greatest player Of All Time, sometimes referred to as GOAT?
Me: Yes

Journo: What do You say to critics that suggest this term should not be used as you can’t compare eras?
Me: “Shut up”

Journo: But can you really and fairly compare tennis through its history?
Me: You can compare obviously. In the beginning they used to use racquets made from trees, I’m not sure where the strings came from. But now they are made of more modern things. This is a comparison. If you couldn’t compare things the word would not be in the existence. I have seen it in the dictionaries.

Journo: What do You think of the Women’s game at the moment?
Me: I think it’s very competitives and I especially like the fashion aspect. The colours are such fun in the Summer times.

Journo: What was Your favourite time in tennis history?
Me: About 9:30 in the evening when I settle down and make the relaxings after being on court.

Journo: Sorry, I mean, what did You think of John ‘the Mac’ McEnroe for example?
Me: Oh I see yes. Well I think it’s great, especially for the kids. Sometimes we take them there as a special treat. They have a play area and you get toys in the Happy Meals. I like the Fillet-O-Fishes. You have to be careful of the amount of sugar in milking shakes but I think they are improving this.

Journo: You travel so much. Other than Switzerland, what is Your favourite country?
Me: Italia.

Journo: Why is that?
Me: I like the tapas and the gondolas.

Journo: The gondolas are in Venice, I don’t believe there’s a tournament there.
Me: I’m not sure, I will check and get back to you.

Journo: What do you think of Spain?
Me: I’ve never been.

Journo: You won in Madrid this year, on the blue clay.
Me: I love it there.

Journo: You’ve had such great success on grass. What do You like so much about Wimbledon? It must be such a special place for You.
Me: Yes it really is. I love everything about it. The traditions, the white, the strawberries and the ice creams. The people there make it so special for Me. Sue Parker is probably My biggest fan, she is lovely. John Floyd too although I feel a little uncomfortable at some of the old photos of him in his undergarments. Tim Tenman is fun. Andrew that lives in a Castle talks a lot as though he is on the QVC but also says nice things.

Journo: What about the great Boris? 
Me: I think he’s incredible. It’s amazing to Me that he moved from the tennis and into politics and now he is the Mayor of London! I think with his busy schedule being the boss of London he is training a lot less now. I like his hair.

Journo: What do You think about the comments that Virginia Wade made about Andy Murray during Roland Garros 2012?
Me: I prefer not to discuss this because I can never make the correct pronunciations of this Lady’s name. Mirky usually tells me off so we move to the next questions please.

Journo: What do You think of tall players?
Me: I don’t like them. They are too tall. I think we should have in tennis on the court itself the little height restriction barriers like in the fun fair and if you are taller than the bar height that I set and you hit it with your head you be disqualified.

Journo: You often describe clay court tennis as having “wider margins” suggesting it’s somehow easier than grass or hard court. Yet most people have the opposite opinion saying it’s probably the most difficult surface to truly master. Hence why so many great champions such as Yourself win on grass but so few consistently win on clay. Can you explain why Your opinion is the opposite to everybody else?
Me: No.

Journo: Thanks so much Roger. It’s been such a pleasure to spend this time with You.
Me: Yes.

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